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Dialogue
Titanic Sinks! …awkwardly
Friday, June 27th, 2008 Wednesday morning, as I prepare to visit the Titanic Exhibition at a local museum:
“Carnegie Science Center.”
“Hi! I know you’re supposed to call a couple days in advance for reservations, but my sister and I were planning on arriving at 1, and I wanted to be sure there was room…”
“I’m sorry, we’re not showing today.”
“Oh, [...]
A visit with grandfather
Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008 “Hey, how old are you?”
“I’ll be 22 in two weeks, Pap.”
“Aren’t you married yet?”
“No.”
“Why don’t you get away from that dog and go meet some boys?”
Insert new acquaintance here
Saturday, March 1st, 2008
“So, Rachel, what are you studying?”
“English.”
“So, you’re going to teach?”
“No, I’d prefer not to. I’d just like to write.”
“Oh, so, like, journalism?”
“No, not really. More on the creative side, I guess.”
“Oh. Like, stories?”
“Maybe.”
“What are some of your ideas?”
“Well, there’s this one about a girl who walks into a mini mart, and her head rolls [...]
Making it better
Tuesday, November 6th, 2007
I’m sitting in my car and staring forward at this scene. It’s not a bad-looking place. I’ve been here many times before and there are good memories.
But today I’d rather not be here. I had just come from a meeting that didn’t go particularly well. I’m sad. I throw my purse against the passenger [...]
Five years ago today
Tuesday, September 4th, 2007 In preparation for school this morning, I would have…
Switched on the overhead light.
It’s still dark outside and my bus comes at 7:17. No, not 7:15. The postcard on the fridge says 7:17.
Slipped a mixed CD into my mother’s old stereo.
Tracks include: Boys of Summer - The Ataris, Gossip Folks - Missy Elliot, Never Leave [...]
Some data worth remembering
Sunday, August 19th, 2007A session at the conference made some video shorts related to the idea of “why you chose the shirt you’re wearing.” Chris Brogan posted all five on his site. I am in the first one, but my favorite (an impromptu comedy about alternative definitions of techie terms), which has nothing to do with the [...]
Conversing among the innocent
Friday, June 29th, 2007 The family sits around in lawn chairs, enjoying the 95-degree weather.
Aunt: “They say you’re supposed to spend three-month’s salary on an engagement ring.”
Derrick rolls eyes.
Rachel: “Yeah, I heard that in Knocked Up. Anyway, Derrick’s uninterested in the subject.”
Aunt (jokingly): “Well, you know, he doesn’t have to be the husband.”
Light laughter ensues.
Samantha, age 7, chimes [...]
His hobbies haven’t changed
Thursday, May 17th, 2007 Upon seeing my younger cousin, Aris, for the first time in over two years, and realizing that he has grown from a prepubescent 5′5″ to a very sturdy 6′2″:
“My God! Are you a football player now?”
“No.”
“Lacrosse? Rugby?”
“No.”
“Do you play anything?”
“World of Warcraft.”
Pittsburgh’s finest
Monday, April 23rd, 2007 Overheard at a fancy restaurant:
Obnoxious old woman: “My son bought me this yippy little dog, and every time I come home, the animal runs up to me and just expects me to reach down and pet it. Like I’ve got nothing better to do when I walk in.”
In a brochure for a local technical [...]
Conversation on marriage with my 6-year-old cousin Samantha
Thursday, November 23rd, 2006 “Rachel, you should marry your boyfriend.”
“Yeah? When should we get married?”
“When you’re 23.”
“Why 23?”
“‘Cause you know someone FOREVER by then.”
Day 11. Thanksgiving cheesecake.
The lighter test
Saturday, November 11th, 2006 Minutes ago, as I struggled to come up with an idea for a post topic, I sat swiveling on Derrick’s computer chair while simultaneously sparking a lighter and blowing out the flame. Spin. Spark. Blow. Spin. Spark. Blow.
He watched for a moment, and with quick thought, took the lighter and announced that he was [...]
Yes, that’s exactly what I mean
Wednesday, November 1st, 2006 “I wish I could write more.”
“Then write more.”
“I don’t have time.”
“Make time.”
“What do you want me to do? Be a recluse? Give up all of my social ties? Slowly lose contact with my family? Move to a log shack in the middle of the woods and spend so much time focused on words and [...]
The numbers game
Monday, September 25th, 2006About once a year, me and my friends drive to a local amusement park and work two 16-hour days as a fundraiser. Usually, they have us working the kiddie rides or carousels. This year, I was assigned to hold a height-stick in front of one of those large, rickety, 240-foot falling contraptions. I like [...]
“Inadvertently Bonding with a Carload of International Coworkers on a Friday Night in a Series of Unknown Location” : A play in five insubstantial acts
Sunday, June 25th, 2006 List of Characters
Hannah : the sensible Scottish* girl
Martin : the curious German* kid
Dom : the outgoing English* boy
Rachel : the apprehensive white girl
Meg : the dreadlock-haired Australian* hippie
Store owner
Cop
*Accents to be exaggerated accordingly.
Act I: 9:00pm, Chesapeake City
Meg: (driving car) “Dude, we need to find someplace to go.”
Hannah: (pointing) “Is that a random disco [...]
Makes me miss high school
Wednesday, April 19th, 2006 “Coach, do we have practice Thursday?”
“Probably. We have two games next week. Why?”
“Well, our dance is Thursday night…”
“What time?”
“7:30.”
“And it’s going to take all of you girls two and a half hours to get ready?”
“Uh, yeah.”
Wherefore art thou jerkface?
Monday, February 13th, 2006 Recently, I recieved a drunken and uncharacteristically rude phone message from a friend who I haven’t spoken to lately. I made the “what the hell” face, hit delete, and went to bed. Upon waking the next morning, I recieved a Facebook message from the same person which I agreeably read:
Good day, my lady. Whilst [...]