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Duel
November 7, 2007
My usual way of dealing with the demon downstairs is to pound my feet against the floor above his bedroom during the five seconds between guitar riffs. I imagine on his end it sounds a lot like a kitten in tap shoes.
This afternoon, he surpassed his usual obnoxiousness. This usually happens when he has one of his groupies around. As I tried to apply eyeliner my mirror shook. My stuffed pig turned and looked at me like “WTF?” and hopped off to confine himself in the microwave.
I took my desk chair and slammed it against the floor. Hard. I heard a boyish giggle below me, and then, “I think she wants an encore.”
It went on like that for twenty minutes. During that time, if you were to peel back the wall of our building, my guess is that you would see a greasy, long-haired adolescent with a deranged look on his face frantically strumming an electric guitar, and on the floor above him, a crazed girl in smeared eyeliner performing a wild mix of the electric slide and choreography from STOMP.
Categories: Daily
November 7th, 2007 at 8:56 pm
Um.
lmao.
November 7th, 2007 at 9:38 pm
Wow…maybe it’s time to move…
Or, to get even, rent some giant speakers, turn them to face the kid’s room, and blast Wish 99.7 when Delilah is on.
November 7th, 2007 at 10:04 pm
its boys like him that make me weep for my generation. knowing me i would just blast music he hates really, really loud right in front of his window. then hit him when he comes outside to see who it is. but, i have hitting issues, so you know, maybe not the best way to deal with the problem haha
November 7th, 2007 at 10:11 pm
That’s quite a scene.
November 7th, 2007 at 10:14 pm
Frank - That sounds lethal. I’m not sure if I could take both at once.
November 7th, 2007 at 10:16 pm
Your poor pig! That mental image was priceless.
K.
November 7th, 2007 at 10:22 pm
I think you should kill him, or tell his mom, same thing.
November 7th, 2007 at 11:25 pm
The last paragraph is priceless.
And, I lived through the nightmare that was Wish 99.7 at 4:00 AM when we lived below medical interns. They’re schedule was so crazy they would forget to turn off their alarms, and it would BLARE oh so terrible Adult Contemporary. Yes, including Michael Bolton.
November 7th, 2007 at 11:49 pm
I would murder the kid.
I once use to have to try to sleep with someone blaring ACDC upstairs from me at oh, 8 am. Who is seriously in the mood for ACDC at 8AM? Really?!
November 8th, 2007 at 12:53 am
Ewww. That sucks.
I hope he moves or something.
But the Electric Slide/Stomp is pretty hilarious in my mind.
November 8th, 2007 at 2:27 am
I’m laughing at the thought of AC/DC at 8am alone. Wow.
November 8th, 2007 at 8:49 am
You might be going about this the wrong way… maybe you should buy him a copy of the movie “Crossroads” and a train ticket.
November 8th, 2007 at 1:49 pm
amy - That’s awesome.
November 8th, 2007 at 5:58 pm
Call the cops.
Repeatedly.
Every day.
Every time he plays.
Until he turns it down.
There’s a difference between being “punk” and being an asshole. “Punks” grow up to become lawyers. Assholes grow up to become the people lawyers put in jail.